Defined or fluid?

dreamstimefree_216586SYSTEM or TALENT POOL: On January 4 I presented my theory about dividing coaches into these two general camps.

  • SYSTEM coaches believe in a game plan, a system, which will bring success. Players have very specific roles to play and their responsibility is to learn and fulfill those roles.
  • TALENT POOL coaches adapt their systems according to the strengths and weaknesses of their players and the challenges of the competition. Players’ roles are more fluid.

I’d like to extend my theory—the way we approach life can also be divided into these two camps.

For example:

  • SYSTEM: Do you want a job (or, if you are hiring, an employee) who wants a list of duties to follow to the letter? OR TALENT POOL: Would you prefer an employee (or boss) who sees what needs to be done, finds ways to do it efficiently, and then looks around for more?
  • How do you envision marriage roles? SYSTEM: Does the husband do husbandy stuff and the wife does wifey stuff? OR TALENT POOL: Do you switch off, doing what fits your skills and the situation?
  • If you were an elementary school teacher, which would be your rule? SYSTEM: “While I am reading you a story, you need to sit at your desk with your hands folded and listen.” OR TALENT POOL: “While I am reading you a story, you may just listen or draw a picture—as long as the picture has something to do with the story I am reading to you.”

I don’t believe that this theory makes any kind of statement about right or wrong. Rather, it’s a question of acquired expectations, personality types, and understanding where you stand.

  • Which camp do you best fit into? Which camp is your boss in? Or your spouse? Or your teacher?
  • Do you feel competent and appreciated? Do you communicate well? Do you sometimes feel as if you were speaking different languages, with the same words coming out of totally different dictionaries?
  • How many recent conflicts emerged due to differing expectations?

Simplistic? Certainly, relationships of any kind don’t depend on just one factor. But understanding another’s basic outlook eases a lot of tension.

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