What do you call a paper airplane that refuses to fly?
Stationery.

How many pieces of candy corn do you think you will eat before you ask youself: “I wonder what a candle would taste like?”

Morning: Too tired to think
Noon: Still thought impaired.
Supper time: Leave something in the microwave til the end of the meal.
Midnight: I could rearrange the kitchen by taking everything out of the cupboards and starting over. What would I put in the silverware drawer?