Kathleen S Evenhouse
Writing With Vision
I can’t even begin to imagine the self-control it takes to work at a bubble-wrap factory. Imagine how much sound a centipede would make if they wore little, tiny flip-flops. If someone from Ziplock would contact just about anyone in the cereal business, it would be a match made in heaven. I was lonely until… Read More
I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one. ~Steven Wright I just ordered a life alert bracelet so when I get a life, I’ll be notified immediately. Milk is the fastest liquid on earth.It’s pasteurized before you even see it. Surround yourselves with friends who pray for you behind your back.
I bought a head of lettuce from a small grocery store called The Mommas and The Papas. I can’t eat it though, ’cause all the leaves are brown. Jimmy asked me to spell “wonton” backwards.I said, “Not now.” There is no better karate instructor than a spider web in your face. The good news is:… Read More
Q: Why are there pop tarts but no mom tarts?A. Because of the pastryarchy. I’m writing a song about getting my door lock replaced.There’s a key change at the end. I want to go on a diet, but I feel thatI have way too much on my place right now. What do you do to… Read More
We had a contest at work for the best neckwear. It was a tie. Photo by Teddy Joseph: https://www.pexels.com/photo/man-wearing-black-suit-2955376/ I asked my dad why he decided to buy a boat. He said, “There was a sail.” Q: Where did Chewbacca learn his knowledge of The Force?A: From Wookieepedia.
Q: What do you call a woodpecker with no beak? A: A headbanger. When chickens communicate, do they use foul language? I’m writing a song about getting the lock on my door replaced.There’s a key change at the end. Love is caring for the mom who cared for you.
I bumped my head on a coffee maker. It left a brews. What party game do fish play at birthday parties?Salmon Says. What do get when you cross a dog with an antenna?A Golden Receiver. Every morning I tell the whole household that I’m going running.Then I don’t go.It’s a running joke. What is a… Read More
Kathleen S Evenhouse 