Kathleen S Evenhouse
Writing With Vision
Q: How can you tell if a tree is a dogwood tree?A: By its bark. Grandpa went to the bank for a loan.The teller said, “I’m sorry, but the loan arranger isn’t in today.”“That’s all right,” Grandpa said. “I’ll just speak to Tonto.” It’s so depressing to work on a horse ranch.I’m surrounded by neigh-sayers.
I was looking for new shoes for walking. As I tried a pair on, I said to the assistant, “It’s too tight.”“Try is with the tongue out,” she replied.I said, “It’th nho ghood, it’th thtill thoo thight.” The state of Texas issued a proclamation: Due to epic issues with obesity, it is now illegal to… Read More
I bumped my head on a coffee maker.It left a big brews. Why is it so easy for an Eagle Scout to get married?Because he knows 50 ways to tie the knot.
How do you choose a favorite lightbulb?By the process of illuminations. Did you hear about the blue ship that collided with a red ship?The survivors were marooned. I’ve started investing in stocks; beef, chicken, and vegetable.One day I hope to be a bouillinaire.
You’ve heard us elderly folk tell you “Enjoy them while they are young.”We are referring to our knees and hips, not your kids. What is the leading cause of dry skin?Towels. What do you call a duck that steals bathtubs?A Robber Ducky.
What do you call a pig with three eyes? Piiig. What is white, furry, and has wheels?A roller bear. Who wrote the book “Great Eggspectations”?Charles Chickens.
Q: What do you get from a forgetful cow?A: Milk of Amnesia Q: What do you call some who says he is from Sweden, but is lying.A: Artificial Swedener Q: Why isn’t suntanning an official Olympic sport?A: Because the best you can ever get is bronze.
Kathleen S Evenhouse 