Kathleen S Evenhouse
Writing With Vision
If a police officer pulls over a U-Haul, did he bust a move? What happens when a microscope bumps into a telescope?A kaleidoscope. The inventor of the umbrella was going to call it “brella,” but she hesitated. What do you call a Sasquatch with noodles for hair?Spag-Yeti.
My last apartment only had four-foot high ceilings.I couldn’t stand living there. You must drop out to graduate from skydiving school. Why is Peter Pan always flying?Because he never lands. I’ve been trying to tell jokes about unemployed people, but they never work.
Did you ever notice that when you lose the remote, you don’t trust anyone.“Are you sitting on the remote.”“Nope.”“Get up!” I’m writing a book about making things louder.I’m on the first volume now. Recently we joined an archaeological party where they were looking for something very specific: The remains of a lower leg.It was quite… Read More
Sheet Music is basically a “sound recipe.” I get so sick of people thinking they can just waltz into my room, when I am obviously listening to music in 4/4. Are you a fermata?Because I’d hold you. My mate told me he failed his exam in Aboriginal Music.I said, “Didja redo it?”
I am not a 10. I am more like two 5s held together by mashed potatoes. You remind be of chapstick,‘cuz you da balm. I’m addicted to seaweed,but I’m seeking kelp.
Read for some musical puns? Please groan in harmony. Soprano: “Hey, you want to hear a joke?”Alto: “Sure.”Soprano: “Melody.”Alto: “I don’t get it.”Soprano: “No, you don’t.” Beethoven: “Are you ready to hear some symphonies?”Audience: (Cheers, whistles, applause)Beethoven: “I can’t hear you!!” What if telling people to be quiet, we just yelled, “Decrescendo!” I hate the… Read More
Dear Life, when I said “could my life get any worse,” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. Q: What do you call a bee hive without an exit?A: Unbelievable. Do you use your right or left hand to stir your coffee?I use a spoon.
Kathleen S Evenhouse 